41 Things

41 Things

We’re somehow to the middle of August again … which means at my birthday again. Which, in turn, means time for another post reflecting on the year–on things learned, things discovered, things loved, things hated. Today, I turn 41. The generally-dreaded 40 is behind me, and I’m somehow still getting older despite all my insistence that I’m still young. 😉 But I love this post because it’s all about embracing the time. What has come, what has gone, what is on the horizon.

A birthday is about more than cake, more than celebrating simply still being alive. It’s about celebrating why and how and who and what. So without further ado, here are my 41 Things.

1. I’m Back!

Just before my birthday last year, I was diagnosed with a tumor on my pituitary gland. It didn’t take me long to realize that nearly all my health problems–exhaustion, weight gain, brain fog, etc–was caused by this tiny little adinoma. These things grow slowly, so it wasn’t considered urgent, and I didn’t actually get in with an endocrinologist until November. Which meant months of knowing what the problem was but not knowing how to fix it. I continued to use the keto diet to control the symptoms, until the endo did some tests, verified what kind of tumor it was, and happily informed me that it was the ONE kind that responds to medication. She wrote the prescription, I started taking it, and within six weeks, I was feeling like ME again. Energy levels back up. Yay! Within a few months, my weight stabilized. And then, glory hallelujah, my brain not only lost the fog, it kicked into full-on DRIVE. I feel more like me than I have in years. Ideas are swirling again. Stories bursting out. I’m praising God for giving me back myself.

2. Cabergoline

And that is thanks to a little tiny pill, which I cut in half and take on Mondays and Thursdays, called Cabergoline. It’s actually a treatment for Parkinson’s, but the micro-dose I take attacks that prolactinoma and kills it. I’ll continue the regimen for a couple years to make sure it really and truly goes away…and then will have to do occasional checks to make sure it’s not growing back again. Which is absolutely fine with me. Though the medication is known for a few side effects, I haven’t experienced any of them. Although it was pretty funny when the doctor asked, “Have you seen people who aren’t there or heard voices others couldn’t hear?” and my husband replied, “She’s a novelist. So…” LOL.

3. Best and Worst Month

It was a rough spring and summer for me though. The book industry is down 15-30%, and as a family who lives on that income, it’s been hitting hard. Then came the death of two of our cats (more on that later) and my step-father-in-law had a massive stroke. Our whole world turned upside down in a lot of ways. Late June-late July was ROUGH. And yet…in that valley, I found myself again. In that valley, I was nourished. In that valley, stories sprang up. One of my Patrons & Peers ladies observed that the mountaintops may be the beautiful vistas, but they’re often barren, really. It’s in the valleys that growth happens. That is certainly true of me. This valley season has been hard, the worst months of our lives in some ways…and the best in others.

4. SIX Books This Year!

Back in 2018ish, I signed two contracts for three books each, which meant 6 books due in 18 months. I did it, but it about killed me. (Okay, slight exaggeration, but I was so burned out by the last books that…well…they were awful, LOL. Both of them required heavy rewrites.) But I’ve done the same thing again in the years since, and it’s been better. So when I ended up with 5 on the schedule for this year–one more than my all-time high–I thought, “Okay. I can do this.” Then…THEN another one came along! SIX books under contract in 2023! It’s a lot. Like, A LOT. My due dates were March 1, March 15, May 1, Sep 15, Nov 1, and Nov 15. If you read that carefully, you’ll see that two sets are due within 2 weeks of each other, so obviously I have to actually get things done before those dates. As of now, I have turned in 4 of the 6. The September one is already off my plate, and I’m writing the November 1. And here’s the crazy thing…I’ve been working on an extra book too! More about that later. 😉 I’m just amazed at how in this time that could be overwhelming, I feel great and am actually overflowing with ideas and energy. A nice change of pace from years past, for sure! (And the other crazy thing? I haven’t had any major rewrites for the last couple years. So I’m not only writing MORE, I’m writing BETTER. Praise be to God!)

5. Yesterday’s Tides Is in the World!

Every book I write is special to me. But some…some have been with me so long that I can’t help but hold them in a very special place in my heart. Such is the case with Yesterday’s Tides. I wrote the first version of it the summer of 2004, when I’d just graduated from college. The idea woke me up in the middle of the night, and I wrote half a book in 3 days. Every single time I’ve worked on it over the years–and it’s undergone quite a few rewrites!–it has utterly consumed me. I was so, so excited when I came up with a way to turn it into a historical and make it my first timeslip. I ADORE the stories I ended up telling with those familiar-to-me characters but some new plot. The cover is stunning. STUNNING. And so far, sales are better than any other recent book, so I have hope that it will continue to do well. But mostly…mostly I’m just so stinkin’ excited that Louisa and Rem, Evie and Sterling are REAL now. 😉 They’re in the world. You can get to know them as I have. And so now, maybe you’ll get it when I say that every single time I’ve vacationed in the Outer Banks over the last two decades, I’ve seen Louisa there, in my mind’s eye. I’ve imagined Rem, out of place but loving it. I’ve smiled as I imagined Evie growing up on those shores. This book is so special, friends. And I’m so, so excited to finally hold it in my hands!

6. The Imposters Begins!

I’m also SUPER excited for the start of my new series! It officially begins in 8 days, but pre-orders through my store have already gone out, so I am totally counting it this year. 😉 Especially because I’ve tried some new things that I’m so excited to show you! Namely, I’m putting together tons of information, games, activities, quizzes, a fashion column…all that ties in with the world of the Imposters. Keep an eye out for it on release day! A Beautiful Disguise is book 1, and oh my gracious, it was such fun to write. I love the cast of characters…including some circus animals to liven things up. 😉 I’ve already written and turned in book 2 as well, and I cannot WAIT to dive into book 3! That will be my last contracted book of the year though, so one more to write first. 😉 Which will be…

7. Unveiled – My first lead book for Guideposts!

Ever since I wrote my first book for a Guideposts multi-author series, I’ve dreamed of someday, maybe, getting to be the lead author on one. I’ve written several test-chapters for them, and if any of those see the light of day, I would get to write that whole first book…but those are all still unknowns. Then, out of nowhere, I got an unexpected email. Another author who’d written a first chapter had to decline writing the whole book, but the series was a go. Would I step in as lead author? On a fiction series about miracles in the Bible? Um…YES!!! So my next-up book is Unveiled, for the new Mysteries & Wonders series that will begin in 2024. And I–am–STOKED! This first book is about the temple veil being torn in two when Jesus died, and I’m so excited to use that existing first chapter as a springboard and finish the story!

8. And a Christmas book!

My other “surprise” contract in the past year was for a Christmas book! Now, I have Giver of Wonders, which is sort of a foundational Christmas story, about the original St. Nick…but I’ve never written a CLASSIC Christmas book, with Christmas trees and lights and presents and sweets and all that fun stuff. But my editor at Bethany House asked if I would, and I quickly came up with a Nutcracker-meets-Downton-Abbey-with-a-bit-of-Scrooge-thrown-in idea. 😉 I wrote it in July in a mere five days and LOVE how it came together. It’s fun and light, no super stressful suspense or villainy going on, just as they requested. It’s called The Lady of Sugar Plum Manor, and the above title image is one I created for my own inspiration, not anything official. 😉

9. How about a Fantasy novel?

And here’s the real kicker, while we’re talking about all the books I’m writing this year. On vacation in June–that hard month–I came up with a fantasy idea that wouldn’t leave me alone. I took 12 pages of notes. And then, when I’d turned in one book but didn’t have to start the next until after a conference, I thought, “Well, let’s just play.” So I started it. And wrote 15,000 words in a week. Then put it aside and wrote The Lady of Sugar Plum Manor. Then had another week when I’d thought I’d still be working on that but ended up with free time, so pulled it out again. And wrote 30,000 words. This is CRAZY! And so much fun. So. Much. Fun.

The story is about a half-mer sea king of the coastal lands who is 275 years old (but physically about 25-30 in appearance/health), growing stronger every year…but revolution is happening beneath the waves among the mer, and threatening his own kingdom too. My heroine is Arden, who has always lived in the shadow of her beloved younger step-sister, Jade…but when the mer kidnap Jade, Arden will do anything to save her–even face down the king and ride one of the legendary Great Golden Sea Hawks to try to find where she’s been taken. Little do they know that the revolution beneath the waves is the trigger for a new kind of power in the world, one prophesied thousands of years before… There’s a big heap of romance, “magic” that is a combination of technology-and-God-given-gift, an anaology to the blood of Christ, adventure, mermaids (who are people who wear tails, they still have legs), and just all the things. I’m having a blast. In case you can’t tell. 😉

I’m actually going to be testing aspects of it like titles and covers and descriptions, so  you’ll all get to weigh in on what you like best! I know not all of you are fantasy-readers, but for anyone willing to give it a try, I want to know that I’m hitting all your favorite notes in all the most appealing ways. I’m super excited to start this experimenting! I even designed a rather generic cover just to test some titles out on…here’s the first one I came up with, though I have a list of twenty-some others you’ll get to vote on too!

10. Ad-Crazy

How am I going to be testing these aspects? Through Facebook ads. My husband took a huge course on running them and has been studying and experimenting all summer, and we brainstormed how to use ads and surveys for books too–not just selling, but basically using them as a focus group. No idea if it’ll work, but we’re excited to try!

11. Reader Survey

But I didn’t wait for experimenting with ads to learn more about what my readers want. I LOVE knowing you guys better, knowing what resonates, what you love and hate…so I created a rather massive survey and shared it in my newsletter and I was so suprised when I got 125 well-thought-out responses! You guys were open and vulnerable and honest, and reading your answers to my questions warmed my heart, made me cry, made me laugh, inspired me, and best of all, armed me with some great ideas of how to best serve you all. THANK YOU!!!!

12. Classes for Writers

Another new venture this year was to spin all my writing classes off onto their own website. Somehow, the domain www.ClassesforWriters.com was available (how??), so we nabbed it, took a week to make it pretty and functional, and tried out some ads there too (no luck on those so far…). The user interface is much better than my old system, and I’m excited to grow my teaching from this new home!

13. St. David’s Christian Writers Conference

I only committed to one conference this summer–I got to be the keynote speaker at the St. David’s Christian Writers Conference, which was held up by Lake Erie. You guys, I have spoken at many conferences and loved all of them, but there was such a sweet spirit at this one. I had a wonderful time, despite getting the news about my step-father-in-law’s stroke while I was there. But everyone was so supportive and kind, enthusiastic about my teaching, and just generally wonderful. Can’t wait to go back someday!

14. Landing Pages for Books

This last year I decided to start creating landing pages for all my books/series (mentioned briefly above). I have one for Yesterday’s Tides which is up and live now, of course, but the idea actually came for The Imposters series, and that was the first one I started working on. You can take a sneak peek of it now, but some of the articles may not be live quite yet. 😉 Planning the big, full reveal of it all for the book’s release!

15. Sea Glass Jewelry

I love to have tie-in products to my books in my shop…and I was happy to see that one of my favorite ideas also turned out to be a favorite of all of YOU! Since I released my Tidal Collection of sea glass prayer jewelry, inspired by Evie in Yesterday’s Tides, I’ve had to reorder countless times. The jewelry is beautiful and simple and timeless…and I do love the idea of “prayer jewelry.” The idea is that you dedicate each piece to whatever prayer concern is weighing on you at the time when you receive it. Then each time you wear it, it’s a reminder to pray for that person or concern, praise God for His faithfulness, or even pray through grief or disappointment. You can see the full Tidal Collection here.

16. An Award!

I don’t enter many contests–as in, any, if I have to be the one to do it. It’s a choice I made years ago. Still, sometimes my publishers enter me, and such was the case with Shadowed Loyalty in the Catholic Media Awards. Chrism entered me, and I was more than a little shocked when I won first place in the “Other Faith-Based Novels” category!

17. The Gatsby Tea

In May, I had the joy of being the guest-speaker for “The Gatsby Tea,” hosted by my local historical society. The tea party itself was beautiful and delicious, and then I spoke on some of the history behind Shadowed Loyalty. This was part of the society’s Gatsby weekend; the next night was a big gala David and I got to attend as the society’s guests, in exchange for that speaking. 😉 It was such a blast!

18. Princess Covers!!!!

It’s no secret. I love designing princess covers…and so with WhiteCrown’s releases ramping up, that means I’ve gotten to do quite a few of them this year! I love finding a unique look and flavor for each book and am so excited about how these have turned out!

19. New Segment

This spring I decided to start a new segment for the newsletter–something JUST for the newsletter, that wouldn’t appear anywhere else. I asked people for the first couple weeks to let me know if they liked it, and I was BLOWN AWAY by the response! Dozens upon dozens of readers replied to let me know that they loved it. Thank you all!! That encouragement came at the perfect time for me.

20. TWO Highschoolers!

For this one school year, I had two highschoolers! Kinda crazy. Xoe was a senior and Rowyn was a freshman, and I was pretty much just an overseer. So proud of them both!

21. A New Bedroom for Rowyn

Okay, so same room, but all new gear. Rowyn was finally ready to pack up all the toys, get rid of the loft-bed-with-slide, retire the desk he’d made himself from a broken bookshelf, and go for a simpler, more grown-up decor. We sold the loft bed, which paid for the new bed and desk, and he now has a very streamlined look in there.

22. Blue Hair

Xoe has long talked about wanting some colorful hair, and this last year, she finally went for it, adding blue streaks to her bangs and underneath. I was all for it, though it took some getting used to visually. I really loved the shades of blue and green it went through as it faded! We just redyed it a couple weeks ago, before she goes off to college. Which leads me to…

23. SJC Legacy!

Xoe applied to and got accepted at 2 colleges. Honestly, I thought she was applying to my alma mater, St. John’s, just as a nod to me and her dad and the old dream–she’d been saying since she was 6 that it’s where she was going to go. But it was a way stronger dream than that, and after we visited in April for Admitted Students Day, we all knew it was where she’d end up. We’re so excited for her, proud to have a “legacy” child (that’s what we call second-generation Johnnies at the school), and can’t wait to see what friends she makes, what she learns, and watch her spread her wings.

24. And a Graduation, Too!

And in addition to college acceptances, we also celebrated Xoe’s high school graduation with her! My first homeschool grad, and we schooled at home from day 1. There were ups and downs to our schooling journey, of course, but I have treasured the years of learning and teaching alongside her and am so proud of all she’s accomplished. I waxed emotional about it a post called Onward and Upward, if you missed it before.

25. OmniPod 5!

Last year I shared how Rowyn, who is a Type 1 Diabetic, was finally approved for and trained on an insulin pump, which made life SO much easier! This year he got to upgrade to the newest version, the OmniPod 5, which is one of the first “smart” pumps that can interpret the data from his continuous glucose monitor (CGM) and respond accordingly, increasing insulin when his blood sugar is on the rise and decreasing it when he’s dropping. He just started it in June, and already his A1C is down a whole point! He’s loving it, and I am so, so proud of him–he does 100% of his diabetic care himself now, aside from me helping him get his Dexcom (that CGM) onto the back of his arm. His endo is INCREDIBLY impressed with him and his control and responsibility and desperate to convince him to be a counselor at diabetes camp next year, so he can show younger kids how they too can live life unafraid.

26. Bleame

Time for my silly product plug. 😉 This summer I decided to give Bleame, a micro-crystal hair “eraser” a try. I love it. Now, I’ll be honest–there are places it just can’t get. I have a horrible time getting it to take the hair off my knees and the ridge of my shin. But that said, I still love it, because it also exfoliates, and it leaves my legs feeling SO INCREDIBLY SOFT! Every time I use it, I have to shove my leg at my husband and say, “Feel how smooth!” LOL.

27. The Plague

My family finally contracted Covid last August–our first and thus far only time. We all got it, it pushed our confirmation back three weeks, which was a bummer, and oh my gracious. I got it worse than the others, and it was just exhausting. No serious complications or anything, but I had a nasty sore throat, and it took me months to get my energy back. No fun! I’ll definitely be skipping that one again if I can help it. 😉

28. Confirmation

Despite the plague-induced delay, our family rejoiced on September 18, when we were all confirmed together (and Rowyn was baptized) into the Catholic church! It was a day of joy and smiles and laughter (though our sponsors ran into a huge traffic standstill and literally ran into the church just in time for their parts), and we are all so, so thrilled to be in this new place. Same faith, but we’ve found new depths. It’s been a beautiful journey, every step of the way!

29. Communion of Saints

Though we’ve been attending our new church for almost two years now, there were a few celebrations that we experienced for the first time in this past year. One of them was All Saints Day on November 1. This is a Holy Day of Obligation, which means we all have to attend a service either the evening before or the day of. David and I actually did both, once with the kids and once without, and it was just…beautiful. More than that. It was an important reminder that we are not alone in serving God–not now in the world, and not throughout history. We are just the most recent of generations of believers, and this day is one where we celebrate the ETERNAL family of God, and all the believers who have come before us. A line of the Apostle’s Creed states “I believe in the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body, and life everlasting.” That communion part is just as important as the other pieces. Praise God that He has welcomed us all into His family, and that we serve Him with all the saints who have come before, all who live and serve with us now, and all who will come after!

30. Goodbye Sammy

In August of 2019, my husband heard a loud mewing under the bushes at our old church when he was mowing the lawn. A scraggly, tiny little kitty emerged, so filthy you could barely see her stripes. After a brief consultation, our family decided that, yes, we could absolutely take in a stray kitten, so we went over with a carrier, bought some kitten food and flea shampoo, and welcomed Sammy into the family. Over the last nearly-four years, she brought us immeasurable joy. Though we thought she was only 8 weeks old or so based on her size, the vet soon informed us that she was actually 6 months old when we took her in–she had adult teeth but was so severely malnourished that her growth was stunted. She never got big–her biggest, heaviest was 6 lbs. She was always kitten-like in both size and personality, and we laughed over her antics every day. She became a total cuddle-bug, always snuggling up on one lap or another. She really loved it when I’d wear a cardigan–she’d burrow in close to my side and disappear in the fabric. She’d spend hours sleeping like that while I worked and would let me carry her around in my sweater too.

Last spring, we noticed she’d lost a lot of weight. Both she and Ivy, one of our older cats, were congested, sneezing, snotty. I took them both the vet, and they thought it was an upper-respiratory thing, but said she could have something underlying it. To watch her weight. Well, she started gaining her weight back, and after another horrible month of snot and sneezes, she seemed better. Acting like herself again. But then she started shedding like crazy, had diarrhea…and within a week, she was gone. She died while we were on vacation (my MIL was coming down twice a day to feed them), and it ripped me apart. I loved that sweet little kitty so much, and it was horrible to come home and find she was gone.

From my reading, it sounds like she had feline leukemia, and I know that only symptoms can be treated, there’s no cure. I had to take comfort in the good years we had with her, in knowing that we gave her those years. In knowing that she was a gift to us and we to her. Still, I miss her. Our forever-kitten will forever be one in our hearts.

31. Goodbye Ivy

Less than a month after we lost Sammy, I noticed that Ivy–the other cat who’d been sneezing and snotty–had a bump beside her mouth. She’d been sneezing blood for months. I’d mentioned it to the vet, but they said it wasn’t uncommon with UR stuff in cats. So I didn’t worry. When I saw the bump, I thought maybe she had an infected tooth, because otherwise she seemed fine. Eating great, acting perfectly normal, aside from the continued sneezing.

So I took her back to the vet, and they said they’d sedate her and do a scan to see what they were looking at. They called the next day to say it wasn’t a tooth, it was a tumor that took up half her head. It curled around her eye, all through her nose, even under her tongue. The poor thing had to be in horrible pain, and they said that while there were things they could try to prolong her life, it wouldn’t ultimately do anything. She didn’t have long, and it would be miserable. They encouraged us to consider euthanasia, and to consider it quickly, because she was still sedated. They could do it then and she wouldn’t have to go through the discomfort of another round of sedation.

Our family had to make a very quick decision. Amidst many, many tears, we decided to take the merciful approach and let them do it then, before she woke up. David dug a grave while Xoe and I went to collect her. Another so-sad day, so quickly on the heels of the last.

Ivy had been my constant companion for 12 years. She was “my” cat. She was always wherever I was. She slept at my feet. She woke me every morning, purring beside my face. She was always on my desk, on my lap, right beside me. While Sammy was all cuteness and kitten energy, Ivy was all loyalty and affection and constancy. I miss her every day too. I can’t believe that in the course of a month, we went from 3 cats to 1. But here we are. Left with years of memories, anyway.

32. Parents

This summer my mother-in-law was working a lot of hours, and by the time she got home, she rarely had energy to cook. David mentioned that she wasn’t eating well, so I started taking dinner up to her whenever I cooked. It was a simple thing, an easy thing, and I liked knowing that we could so easily help take care of the woman who had taken care of David for so many years, and who had opened her property to us. Then at the end of June, David’s step-father had a massive stroke. He and my MIL had divorced several years ago, he has no other family, so David was the one on whom the burden of this fell. He was the one making medical decisions, driving 3 hours each way to visit him three times a week, listening as he struggled to regain his speech, arranging care…it was hard. In many ways, nothing else got done that month for David. And it took a toll on him, I won’t lie. But I also loved seeing him put everything else aside to take care of the man who had chosen to be his father. They’d gone through a rough couple of years, but he put that aside. And his stepdad saw it, appreciated it. He’s recovering well now, and I’m praying he continues to do so, and that somehow, through this horrible thing, good will come.

33. Patrons & Peers Creative Retreat!

Last October, some of the P&P ladies and I got together in Georgia for a creative retreat. It was a bit experimental, and some of the people who had planned to come ended up sick and unable to travel, but even so. We had such a wonderful time that within a day we were already planning the next one.

During the day, we all pursued our creative goals–some of us wrote, two quilted, one painted. We fixed and enjoyed dinner together and spent the evenings fellowshipping. We took walks and talked and laughed and planned. It was SUCH a wonderful time!

This year, our retreat will be in Avon, North Carolina–beach! WOOT! We’ll have the house for a full week, but we split most of the rooms up with a mid-week turnover, so that people could just come for a half week. We still have a few spots available! 😉 If you’re interested in joining us for this time of creativity, reading, beach-going, and fellowship, you can still get in on the fun by subscribing to the group (there are some very small entry level options there) and then signing up for the trip! Travel is on you, but food and lodging are included. =)

34. The Expanse Books

Our family had watched the Expanse television series on Prime and thoroughly enjoyed it. David quickly gobbled up all the books too, but I kept putting off reading more than the first one because they’re just so LONG. LOL. Finally, over Christmas, I said, “Hey, how about we listen to the audio book together?” So we turned it on…and a new tradition was born. Over the next six months, David and I listened to all of the books together. It was such fun to experience them together, to get to talk about each chapter as we finished it. They were great reads (and listens), though definitely NOT Christian, so keep that in mind. They’re science fiction and such amazing storytelling! So, so glad we read them together!

35. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone

On the way home from vacation this year, we turned on the first Harry Potter audio book and listened to it as a family. I’ve read all the books but no one else in my family had, so we thought it would be fun. And it definitely was! Perfect length for our trip, too. 😉 We then watched the movie together a couple weeks later, and I’m plotting when we can listen to the rest. =)

36. Rereading (listening to) Twilight

For the last, oh, eight or so years, I’ve been thinking that someday I’d like to reread the Twilight Saga. I really loved them back when I first read them way back when, and I was curious what I’d think of them now. But honestly, I never reread books. I don’t have time. BUT…I do relisten to books, or listen to ones I’ve read before. It’s a whole different experience, and also uses different time. I listen while I drive, exercise, and do chores. Times I definitely can’t be reading. So I’ve listened to the first two and am in the third now and am enjoying them all over again. Pretty sure my thoughts have changed a bit, but even so. I can still appreciate now what I did then. And I’m having fun revisiting what had been such a sensation all those years ago. 😉

37. Moscato

I have never had a moral issue with wine–Jesus not only drank it, after all, making it was his first miracle! But I’ve never liked wine, or any other alcohol. I love the bottles, the colors…just not the taste, LOL. My MIL got some sparkling Moscato for New Years a couple years ago, though, and I discovered that I actually like it. Probably because the alcohol content is ridiculous low. 😉 It’s a sweet, bubbly white, and my husband (who does like wine) likes that we finally found something I’ll share with him. So now every other week or so we get a bottle of Castello del Poggio and share it over the course of a week. I also discovered I can handle a bit of amaretto too! I don’t like much, but a half-ounce or so is lovely now and then.

38. Duraflame in the Fireplace

Last autumn, a tractor trailor packed with Duraflame logs caught on fire on our portion of interstate, and the place where my MIL works received a ton of damaged boxes to sell at deep discount. She snagged a bunch of them for us, and we started using them in our fireplace in the evenings while we listened to those audio books together. Such a pleasant way to pass our winter evenings!! I’m of course sorry about that fire, but I’m pretty happy that it resulted in a couple years’ worth of cheap logs for us to use. 😉

39. Recipes

I’ve really enjoyed adding recipes to the website this year! There have been times when I’ve thought being a recipe blogger would be fun, but I never actually wanted to give up all my other stuff to really do it. When I thought of a way to incorporate it into my existing stuff though, featuring tie-in recipes to my books…yay! I have a whole list of recipes I intend to add as time permits, and just a few weeks ago I was doing some testing for an all-new recipe to include in the back of The Lady of Sugar Plum Manor. Can’t wait to share it with you all!

40. Website Redesigns

This last year I not only gave my website a new look, which I love, I also just did a refresh of the look of WhiteFire’s store page, READ. We’ve got new deals, new looks, and we’re excited to connect with some new readers! So, you know…check out the bundle deals we offer there, and the fresh look of the pages too. 😉

41. Blunt Bob Is Not for Me

I’ll end on a light note. 😉 I love a good bob hairstyle. Over the years, I’ve tried pretty much all of the variations. All except the blunt-edged bob. So I decided to give it a try, ignoring the dubious look on the face of the hairdresser I’ve gone to since I was six. What could possibly go wrong?

Well, what I neglected to realize was that the blunt bob is great for people with fine or thin hair–it adds volume. But, um…I have incredibly thick, textured, full-of-body hair. Sure, I could get it to look okay in that picture up there–but it took a lot of work with a flat-iron to convince that bottom not to pouf out like a triangle, LOL. Lesson learned! I can do a stacked bob, a classic bob, a tapered bob, an asymmetrical bob…but no more blunt ends for this girl!

And there’s my list! I hope you enjoyed traveling through my year with me. It’s been one of some crazy ups and downs…mountaintops and valleys…hard times and good times. I’ve experienced incredibly joy and unexpected pain. There have been financial hardships, emotional hardships, blessings beyond compare, and lessons learned and savored. Year 40 is one I won’t soon be forgetting, that’s for sure.

I pray that this next one will be one where we grow ever closer to the Lord. Where He shows us where our paths will take us next. Where we’ll see Truths about Him and each other, and enjoy all the discoveries that come along our Way.

Thank you all so much for being part of my life!

Reproached and Redeemed

Reproached and Redeemed

My people, what have I done to you?
How have I offended you? Answer me!

I led you out of Egypt,
from slavery to freedom,
but you led your Savior to the cross.

For forty years I led you
safely through the desert.
I fed you with manna from heaven,
and brought you to a land of plenty;
but you led your Savior to the cross.

What more could I have done for you?
I planted you as my fairest vine,
but you yielded only bitterness:
when I was thirsty you gave me vinegar to drink,
and you pierced your Savior with a lance.

For your sake I scourged your captors
and their firstborn sons,
but you brought your scourges down on me.

I led you from slavery to freedom
and drowned your captors in the sea,
but you handed me over to your high priests.

I opened the sea before you,
but you opened my side with a spear.

I led you on your way in a pillar of cloud,
but you led me to Pilate’s court.

I bore you up with manna in the desert,
but you struck me down and scourged me.

I gave you saving water from the rock,
but you gave me gall and vinegar to drink.

For you I struck down the kings of Canaan.
but you struck my head with a reed.

I gave you a royal scepter,
but you gave me a crown of thorns.

I raised you to the height of majesty,
but you have raised me high on a cross.

My people, what have I done to you?
How have I offended you? Answer me!*

 

We weren’t there, standing outside the courts of Pilate and shouting, “Crucify Him!” We weren’t there in the Praetorium, striking Him and spitting on Him and whipping Him. We weren’t there on the hilltop, mocking Him and telling Him to save Himself.

We weren’t there. But our sins were. Our pride. Our unbelief. Our doubt. Our heresy. Our judgment. Our scorn.

Our sins stained the air. The weight of them bore Him down upon that cross. They separated Him from His precious Father in a way nothing had ever done before. Because He was fully human, we know He asked why. Why? Why were the people He loved so much treating Him this way?

And yet, even in that horrible wonder, even as He yearned for it to be different, He made the choice not to save Himself…so that He could save us. We delivered Him to the ultimate pain, the ultimate humiliation, the ultimate sorrow…and He used it for our redemption.

He gave us the world. We gave Him the cross. And then by that cross, He gave us heaven too.

Lord, I am unworthy. And yet, by Your blood, made worthy. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

 

*Taken from the traditional Good Friday Reproaches (Improperia)

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Love on Repeat

Love on Repeat

We can never hear “I love you” enough. Right?

Well, we may need to add a little more–we can never hear “I love you” enough when the person saying it means it. We can never hear it enough when it’s given as a gift, not meant to manipulate. We can never hear it enough when it’s true and free and welcome. If those conditions are met, those are the sweetest words in the world. We thrill to hear them the first time, and while the hearing becomes less surprising with repetition, it’s no less welcome.

I love you, repeated often, becomes a strong thread woven through the tapestry of our lives. We know, by hearing it regularly, that it’s true. We know that it means something–we know that the meaning goes far beyond the syllables and to the implications of the word.

We can trust that person.
We can depend on them.
We can be vulnerable and open with them.

And that’s just the little miracle that happens when we receive that repeated affirmation of love. What happens when we give it?

It could be hard for us to say those words the first time to someone. What if they don’t feel the same way? Is it too soon? What if you think it’s love, but it’s not? That hesitation goes away with “practice,” though, right? The more you say it, the easier it is to say.

No, not just that though. The more you say it, the more you mean it. The more you say it, the more you become aware of its truth. The more you say it, the more it becomes part of what defines you. It becomes who you are. You are both beloved and lover. You are part of something greater than yourself.

The same thing holds true with God, and with our repeated words of praise and love for Him.

Jesus warns us against “vain repetitions,” and for good reason. It’s easy to forget the meaning of words we say a lot. It’s easy not to think about them. It’s easy to use them to manipulate others, or to try to manipulate God into doing what we want. We can say your will be done and mean my will be done. We can say to God be the glory and mean look how holy I am. We can say praise Jesus and mean well that was lucky.

But I think many of us think the “repetition” part is the problem, and so think we have to eschew any old, memorized prayer.

Here’s the thing. Growing up, I never said the “Now I lay me down to sleep” rhyme, largely because it was “vain repetition.” Instead, I made up my own prayer. And you know what? I said that same exact prayer every night for years. Oh, there was a place to “personalize it” and name particular needs. But even those were the same so often that eight-year-old Roseanna would sometimes just say, when she was really tired, “and all of those others.” Did the repetition ever become vain? Sure. There were nights I rattled it off, barely thinking about it. But that wasn’t the norm, and it wasn’t my habit. My habit was to pause and think about it.

With my own kids, we’ve prayed together every night since they were little. And guess what–it’s the same basic words every night, the same basic pattern. Oh, we fill in different blanks, and I have a few variations…but in general? It’s the same. Why?

Because when we find the words that capture the meaning of our hearts, we use them over and over again. And that’s good. There are words and phrases and prayers we should repeat!

Glory to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit!
.
Holy, holy, holy, Lord God of hosts–heaven and earth are full of your glory!
.
Hosanna in the highest! Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord!
.
Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world–have mercy on us!
.
Our Father, who is in heaven, may your name be set aside as holy!

I remember years ago, there was a member of our church who asked me why we said the Lord’s Prayer in every service. “Don’t you think that’s vain repetition?” she said. This was no novice of the faith, either–this was someone who’d grown up in the church and was in full-time ministry.

I just blinked at her. I mumbled something about wanting to make sure the kids knew it. But the real answer should have been, “It’s only vain if it’s vain.”

Let’s look at the main definitions of the word, shall we?

1: having or showing undue or excessive pride in one’s appearance or achievements
2: marked by futility or ineffectualness
3: having no real value

It isn’t the repetition of a memorized prayer that makes it vain, now, is it? No. The only thing that makes a prayer vain is our intention. Are we saying it to look good? Vanity. Are we saying it without believing it will do anything? Well, God may still surprise us, but if we truly don’t believe, I’d call that vain. Do the words themselves have no meaning? Same.

But that’s on us. Not on the words. The words themselves, no matter how many times we repeat them, are good words. They’re the words God Himself gave us in His Word. They can bring life and hope and promise and joy…if we use them right.

We don’t render the mathematical table “useless” by memorizing it. We learn its value, in fact. We don’t render our declarations of love futile by repeating them often. A million heartfelt thank-yous will be a million times genuinely received. The danger is when we say “you’re welcome” and really mean “I resent you.” It’s when we speak of love but feel bitterness.

It’s when we pray, but want God to comform to our will.

In our lives, whether we’re talking to our spouses or our children or our God, repetition can be one of the best things we do–as long as we keep our hearts right. Say those words a lot. Put them on repeat. And every time you say them, hear them, or even think them, let the truth of it sink deep.

Dwell in the words. Dwell in what they represent. And mean it.

2023 Word of the Year – Linger

2023 Word of the Year – Linger

Back when I first started doing a Word of the Year, it was something I would first pray about and then just … wait for. I’d wait for something to jump out at me, either in my Bible reading, in church, in a song, in a conversation, or whatever. Some years, I’d pray but nothing would jump out. Some years, the word I received ended up being a little scarily prophetic, like when I was given “Overcome” and then a few months later my sister was diagnosed with cancer–which she totally beat.

In more recent years, I’ve been proactive, making lists and evaluating them and choosing my word through deliberation and prayer. That gave me “intentional” in 2021 (still one of my favorites!) and then “devotion” in 2022. As I began to ponder and pray about what I should choose for 2023, I expected to have to make a list, do that thinking and praying over it, see what stuck.

So I hopped in the shower one morning with that in mind, said a prayer that God would lead me to the right word, let my mind go over some of the themes in life and faith that had been popping up for me, and BAM! It hit me. My word. And not only did the word itself hit me, my mind was immediately flooded with what it meant, how it would and should play out, all that it held wrapped up in its six little letters.

Linger.

That might sound like a strange word to choose, right? But hear me out, LOL.

I have never been the most patient person in the world. I’m goal-oriented. One of those people who like to over-achieve and get assignments done early. I always did the extra credit in school. I turned my first contracted manuscript a full month ahead of deadline. When someone says, “This takes an hour,” my first thought is always, “Bet I can streamline and get it down to 45 minutes.”

In some things in life, this is a very handy personality trait. I work well with and under deadlines, I’m self-motivated, and that means I can live the author life very well. But…

But. It isn’t exactly the best way to go about things like faith, relationships, and spiritual growth.

Linger.

I remember when I was a kid, it drove me NUTS that my parents would say it was time to go–from a friend or family member’s house, after a church function, whatever–and then they’d stand there at the door chatting for another half hour. Impatient Me sometimes resented that they’d called me away from my friends just to linger with theirs…or I was tired and ready to go to bed…or I just didn’t care about what they were talking about. I am 100% guilty of being that kid who would tug on her parents’ hands, trying to physically pull them out the door.

My parents knew the value of lingering–of spending time with the people and things that matter. It’s a lesson I’ve been learning–to greater or lesser success–all my life.

Linger.

As an adult, when it’s me having dinner with friends or family, certain situations will inspire me to linger. When it’s friends I haven’t seen enough of…when the rest of my schedule has been cleared…when I know that whatever waits at home is less important than this time invested. When that’s the case, I can and do linger. There are still many times, though, that there’s something pressing at home, tugging on me. Responsibilities grabbing hold of my hand and trying to pull me out the door. Sometimes they are totally legitimate.

But sometimes, I should ignore them.

Linger.

This last year, I did the Bible in a Year, which I’m totally glad I did. It got me out of my too-short-reading rut and gave me assignments–I love assignments! I could feel like I accomplished something at the start of every day. But as I’ve drawn near to the end of the program, I realize that while it served its purpose, it also had a drawback–it didn’t leave me time to really dwell in a text. To contemplate. To dig deep. It didn’t give me time to linger over the Word, and while I certainly could have taken that time, I was always also eager to move on to my morning prayer too. I’ve been spending about an hour each morning with God in one form or another, and I love that…but this year, I want more of that time to be that lingering contemplation and less of it to be charging through the set number of verses.

In the year to come, I intend to practice the Lectio Divina method, where one reads the same passage several times, contemplating it and seeing what jumps out at you. You examine each word and phrase, ask questions about context and meaning, and really spend time with a short passage instead of charging ahead to get through it.

Linger.

As a work-from-home mom who homeschools, our whole family occupies the same space 24/7. I’ve had to learn how to work with the kids around. But my daughter’s a senior this year. I’m so, so aware of how she won’t be here next year for many of our annual traditions, if she’s away at college. It makes me realize that though we each need to do our work, we also need to treasure that time together, all those moments.

Linger.

I need to linger with the Lord and those I love. I need to linger in the things that matter. That’s what this year’s word comes down to for me. I’ve been intentional, I’ve examined my own devotion. Now it’s time to dive deep into what matters most and stay there for a while.

Have you chosen a Word of the Year for 2023? If you’re uncertain about why people even do this or need some idea, read my article on “How to Choose an Intentional Word of the Year” for explanations and ideas.

2022 Word of the Year Reflection – Devotion

2022 Word of the Year Reflection – Devotion

As December, and hence 2022, draw to a close, it’s that time when I pause to reflect upon the twelve months that have just passed, especially in light of my Word of the Year. In January of 2022, I chose the word “Devotion” to guide me into the year to come.

As I debated what word to choose and why, “Devotion” came to mind because it would help me focus on what I truly wanted to be devoted to…and then actually spend my time on those important things, rather than pushing them to the margins in the face of the daily grind.

My “devoted to” list included:

  • God
  • My family
  • My call to write
  • Learning

But all too often, those things weren’t what was getting my time. Instead, most of my hours and days and weeks were spent doing the things that may have been good but weren’t my passion, weren’t my top-of-the-list. I wanted to refocus for 2022, free up some time for those Most Important Things, and truly devote myself to my faith and family and calling.

With that in mind, the big thing I did was take control of my design calendar and say “one cover design a week.” My “rule” before had been 2, but it frequently turned into 4 or 5, plus typesetting jobs, plus WhiteFire work, plus… everything. It was too much, and I was not only left without solid writing time, I was also left pushing things like my morning prayer and Scripture reading into five minutes. Not good! Hence that one-a-week cover design rule that I instituted. The result is that I’m already scheduling designs five months in advance, so I’ve had to encourage my clients to think ahead. And there have been times when I’ve gotten behind thanks to a writing deadline, so a few extra pile up. But in general, that “rule” has helped me SO much! I’m glad I instituted it and intend to carry it forward and be even more strict about it in 2023. (My November and December somehow ended up with an average of 4 projects a week again, because I just didn’t have the gumption to tell people no, LOL.)

One way I gave myself the space to do this was to start my direct-support group, Patrons & Peers. This is a Patreon-style group, but run directly through my website here. My supporters can choose their subscription level, and in exchange for that support, they receive perks and–far more important!–are invited into the P&P community. When I started the group, I had this dream that it wouldn’t just be about supporting me, but about supporting each other. That it would be faith-filled believers acting like the Church should, loving and encouraging each other. AND IT IS. I am still so floored by this, and deserve none of the credit. It’s the ladies themselves who have made this possible by being open and loving and filled with the Spirit of God. This group has not only blessed me financially throughout the year, enabling me to whittle down that design calendar, they’ve blessed me emotionally, spiritually, and mentally as well. I love reading the group emails and listening to/watching the Marco Polo videos. We’ve become friends. Sisters. A true community. We sign off with “love you guys!” and pray for each other daily. These ladies have helped me pursue my true devotion and have inspired me daily to walk worthy of the call of Christ. Thank you, “Roseanna Girls!”

In 2022 I also decided to do a Bible in a Year program, to force myself out of that 5-minutes-of-reading slump I’d been in. I chose to do the ESV Catholic Version and have really enjoyed reading all the Deuterocanonical texts as well as the familiar Scriptures in a new-to-me translation!

My husband and I have also been doing the Liturgy of the Hours together in the morning, listening to the Invitatory and Morning Prayer together in the Divine Office app on my phone. I love that these songs and recitations have grounded my heart in the Psalms–as I go throughout the day, I often find myself singing, “Come now, let us bow down to worship, bending the knee to the Lord our Maker! For He is our God, and we are His people, the flock He shepherds. Come, let us sing joyful songs to the Lord!” I’ve memorized several Psalms this way through the year without even meaning to! I try to listen to the Office of Reading too, when I can, which in addition to prayer and psalms and Scripture also has a short excerpt from a historical sermon. I love getting little bites of the Church Fathers this way!

Now…writing. This is “me.” This is what I do. I wanted to free up more time for it, and boy, have I done that! While I’m still not writing every day or anything, I have successfully completed 4 full-length manuscripts this year, plus edits and rewrites, and am about halfway done a 5th. I’ll have 4-5 due next year as well, so I’m so happy to have established a rhythm and routine that allows for more writing time. I still am scheduling most of it in big blocks (and don’t always remember to mark that week off on my design calendar, hence those occasional back-ups), but that’s what’s working for me in this season, so I’ll just run with it. =)

And now, study. I wanted to give the proper attention to both research for my novels and my own spiritual formation, and while I still have room for improvement here, I feel like I’ve made real strides! I did a lot of research for both Yesterday’s Tides and my new Imposters series for Bethany House, and I read a truly amazing book on Mary Magdalene in preparation for writing At His Feet for the Extraordinary Women of the Bible series for Guideposts. My husband and I have also both read several books together that we then discuss as we take walks, and that’s been a real joy too! And in the autumn, one of my P&P ladies, Laura Heagy, started sharing some Spiritual Formation exercises with us each month, which have also helped me focus time and some reading on this important goal.

Was 2022 a perfect year? Of course not. I had plenty of moments of frustration, of overwhelm, of exhaustion. There were days when the words wouldn’t come or when the headaches were too bad, and I got seriously derailed for a week or two by learning that I have a benign tumor on the pituitary gland in my brain. But for all that, as I look back on where I was a year ago and where I wanted to be this year, I know that I have, in fact, chased after that devotion with my whole heart. I had moments of failure, of course, but I picked myself back up and started again. Redevoted myself. Focused again on God and what He’s given me, what He’s placed in my charge, what He’s called me to.

And I already know how I’ll continue that work in 2023–my Word of the Year came to my mind and heart very quickly, as soon as I started thinking about it, and I’m looking forward to telling you more about how, in 2023, I intend to Linger with God, with His word, with His people, and with those things and people who make me who I want to be. Come back on January 1 to read my Word of the Year post!

Holiday History Recollection #5

Holiday History Recollection #5

Welcome back to my series on Holiday History Recollections, where I’m looking at some of the posts I’ve done over the years on the history of holiday words and traditions!

Holiday History Recollection #1
Holiday History Recollection #2
Holiday History Recollection #3
Holiday History Recollection #4

Since today is not only Boxing Day but also the Second Day of Christmas, I figured today is the PERFECT day to take a look at both the Twelve Days and Boxing Day traditions!

So…what’s Boxing Day? Though our friends across the pond don’t even have to ask, we Americans may scratch our heads a bit at this one. We know that it is, just not necessarily what it is.

From reading, I knew that Boxing Day was the day after Christmas, which, historically speaking, servants had off to celebrate Christmas with their families. But obviously there’s more history to it than that, right?

Of course there is! 😉

The phrase itself originated in 1809, but it comes from a practice that dates back to the Middle Ages. The day after Christmas was, you see, traditionally the day when the alms-box located at each church was opened up and distributed among the poor. It also then became the day when servants, service people like postal employees or errand boys, etc, could expect a gift from their employers, usually given in a small box. And then, of course, it was also the day servants could then leave the masters to fend for themselves and go enjoy the contents of those gift boxes with their own families or friends. The boxes usually included gifts of money and leftover food from the Christmas feast.

These days, Boxing Day has become a shopping holiday, filled with sales much like America’s Black Friday deals. It’s when people can expect the best sales of the year. There are certain areas in Canada where this has been banned and retailers are to remain closed on Dec 26, to provide the holiday to their employees. Very traditional, that. 😉 In those regions, Dec 27 gets the good sales instead.

These days, all the hype is leading up to Christmas. So much so that on December 26, it feels kinda like a letdown, right? The all-Christmas-music-all-the-time radio stations are back to normal programming. Some people start taking down decorations. By the time New Year’s rolls around, people look at you like you’re crazy if you’re still wishing them a Merry Christmas.

I do it anyway. Why? Because the Christmas season traditionally begins on December 25. It doesn’t end there.

The Christmas season is about much more than a day: it is about celebrating the miracle and life of Christ. Just as we have the Advent Calendar to count up to Christmas Day, so we also have the Twelve Days, which follow Christmas and lead up to the Epiphany on January 6.

Surviving mainly in Europe today, the Epiphany is a long-celebrated day that remembers the arrival of the Magi. Literally “Manifestation,” the Epiphany is also the day taken to commemorate the second birth or baptism of Christ and the importance of God being made man through that act. In many parts of the world, the Epiphany is just as celebrated (or even more so) as Christmas…and in the days when sweets and citrus fruits were primary decorations, children especially loved this day, because it’s when they got to eat those candies and fruit. 😉

The Twelve Days covers all sorts of important moments in Christianity, like Christ being named 8 days after birth. The importance of the Christmas star. The journey the magi took. The baptism of Christ, as already mentioned. And so much more.

Of course, many of us know about the Twelve Days solely because of THAT SONG. You know the one. Love it? Hate it? Tradition states that the song was created during the early years of the Reformation in England, used as an encoded teaching tool for Catholics, with each day or item representing something about their faith, so that they could teach it to their children without bringing the Protestant authorities down on their heads (this being the age when being Catholic would get you sent to the gallowed in England, quite literally). Is there truth to this theory on the song? Historians disagree. But while the real story behind it is murky, the song itself has certainly persisted!

In our family, we like to remember the full Twelve Days and never take decorations down until the traditional day, January 6. And there’s something really special about stretching it out like that. About making Christmas the start of something, instead of the end. Because really, Christ’s arrival was just the beginning. And this helps us to remember that.